Interchange
by redwolfoz
Summary: Choose your Author ficathon. Dawn asks about the proverbial birds and bees. Dawn knows what sex is and the basics of how to do it, but she wants to know more


**Choose your Author Ficathon:** actual birds and bees, trunk full of toys, they are just friends

**Note:** Written for Missy. Many thanks to the luscious Moonbeam for volunteering as beta.

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**Interchange**

by Red Wolf

Spike was just settling in to watch _Passions_ when he heard a scream from outside. A familiar scream. Dawn's scream. He was at the door, missile in hand, in an instant. But all he could see was a very vocal and distressed woman heading across the cemetery towards him.

Dawn was running as fast as she could, as if something was chasing her, but she was making the strangest gesticulations. She dove into Spike's crypt, slammed the door closed and leaned against it, her chest heaving as she tried to catch her breath.

"'lo, Bit. Nice of you to drop by." Spike tossed the golf ball he was holding, back into the bucket by the door.

Dawn lifted a hand in greeting, words still secondary to her need for air. She leaned down, hands on her knees and breathed deeply. "Bees," she managed.

"Oh," Spike chuckled. "They moved in yesterday. The swarm took up residence in the tree near the entrance. Are you okay, love?"

"Don't think I got stung, but something hit me on the back of the head." She winced as she felt the area, not surprised to see a small smear of blood on her finger.

Batting her hands away, Spike sat her on the couch and gently examined the wound. "It's only a small gash. Could have been a bird."

"What?"

"The local bird population is having a field day with the bees. They must have been trying to run you off from their insect buffet."

"Well, it worked. How long will that keep up?" She nodded towards the door.

Spike shrugged. "Don't know. Birds have to sleep some time, guess they'll quiet down at dusk."

Dawn smiled. "Looks like your stuck with me for a while."

"Come on, love. Let's get you downstairs and clean up that cut."

Dawn followed Spike, nearly tripping over the bucket by the door. "Why do you have a bucket of golf balls?"

"Some clown has been practising in the park and keeps lobbing them over the cemetery walls." The damage to the headstones was driving the groundskeeper nuts, especially as he never saw the golf balls. Spike had been collecting them during the night and selling them to the nearby driving range. "Took out a Jundat demon with one the other night, very handy."

"Cool. Killed it?" Spike took her arm and helped her downstairs before she tripped over anything else.

"Thought so for a minute, but it crawled off to lick its wounds while I was taking down a vamp. Now let's get your head sorted." He sat her on the bed while he gently cleaned her scalp wound. It was barely a scratch, the blood had made it look far worse than it really was. "There you go. You'll live."

"Thanks." Dawn experimentally poked at the cut again and got her hand slapped away.

"I just cleaned that, don't pick at it and get it infected."

"Yes, Mom," she giggled.

Spike put his first aid kit away and seated himself against the head of his bed, moving his legs to accommodate Dawn as she wriggled into the middle of the bed.

"So what brought you to my neck of the cemetery, love."

Spike had to pull his legs up again as Dawn dived across the bed and retrieved her backpack. He watched in mild horror as she pulled paperwork out of it and cheerfully spread it across the bed. Spike was certain more paper had materialised than it was possible to fit in the bag.

"Homework?"

"Homework. I have a serious English assignment." Dawn pulled a face and tossed her pack aside.

"Ow! Dawn, is there some reason your pack is trying to stab me?" Perhaps _stab_ had been too strong a word, but unexpectedly poked in the ribs sounded far less manly. Spike snagged the bag, rummaging about inside and producing the offending gift-wrapped object for Dawn's puzzled perusal.

"Anya gave it to me earlier." Dawn's first stop after school had been the _Magic Box_. "I was going over my notes from class and Anya asked what they were. Then I had to listen to today's exciting episode of the Anya and Xander sexcapades and there are some things about their relationship I'd rather not know about. I thought it would be quieter here. She gave me that before I left. Said I was all grown up." Dawn wasn't completely certain, but she thought Anya may have been holding back tears.

"Exactly what are you studying?" Spike had a pretty good idea where this was heading.

"We had sex ed today, it was so lame." Dawn had been far from impressed at a lecture that was a slide show of anatomical sketches followed by an admonishment that sex was bad and something to be avoided until you were safely married off to a fellow gormless virgin. After which time, it was mysteriously no longer considered bad.

Spike handed over Dawn's gift. "I think you'd better unwrap that."

Tearing the wrapping apart revealed a plain white box. Dawn slide a fingernail through the seal on one end and a slim gold cylinder with a rounded end slid into her palm. "What is it?"

Retrieving the item and it's packaging, Spike shook a battery from the box, inserted in the end of the object, twisted the base and handed it back to Dawn with an amused grin.

Dawn held the vibrating cylinder in her hand for several seconds before her look of confusion was replaced with an embarrassed blush. "Oh! It's a, um..."

"It's a vibrator, love." Spike pointed out the control on the base. "Twist it to control the speed and turn it off."

"But it's, um..." Dawn really couldn't get much redder. She was sitting on Spike's bed, trying to remember how speech function while holding a vibrator. She was hoping for a convenient portal to open up and suck her into some hell dimension, but it seemed that evil wasn't taking requests at the moment.

"You'll have heaps of fun with it."

And Dawn had thought the situation couldn't get any worse. Now Spike was actually talking about her using the thing.

"Dawn. Are you all right? You've gone really red and you're putting out enough heat to feel from where I'm sitting."

Taking a deep breath and staring at her lap, which meant staring at her shiny, new vibrator, but it seemed safer than looking at Spike. "Okay. Didn't expect it." With slightly shaky hands, she finally turned the vibrator off and placed it on the bed.

"You sure you want to know about sex?" Spike was concerned. Dawn's reaction was quite sweet, but she looked like she'd bolt at the drop of a hat. If she didn't die of acute embarrassment first, Spike idly wondered if that was possible.

Dawn nodded and managed to meet his eyes at last. It was brief glance, before her gaze slid away to a far more interesting pattern on his bedcover, but it was a start.

"Okay, love. Start with the basics. Before you even think about having sex you will be on some form of birth control and you will be using condoms. This is non-negotiable. Some men will lie their arse off to avoid condoms; your life is worth more than their vanity, show them the door. If I hear you've been taking stupid risks, we will be having words. Your date, on the other hand, will be very dead."

Spike's tone lightened as he continued. "Sex is supposed to be enjoyed by both parties." Dawn's skitterish gaze returned, confusion replacing her discomfit. "That means consent all around. If he's doing something you don't like, tell him. Better yet, tell him what you do like. Trust me, men like it when they know how to get you off."

Spike picked up Dawn's vibrator. "And this is one good way of finding out what you like. Hey, don't go all shy on me again. If you don't know what you like, how is some fumbling teenage boy supposed to figure it out? We're talking about a bloke who can't manage to unhook a bra and can barely manage to find his own dick without instructions here." That finally drew a giggle from Dawn. "He'll need all the help he can get."

Sighing, Dawn wondering if she'd ever have a boyfriend. "Can't see that happening for a long time."

Spike snorted in derision. "Come off it, Bit. You know that tosser from the basketball team? One with the really bad blond streaks?"

Dawn nodded. "Trent."

"Figures. He has a serious case of the hots for you. Admittedly he's got a hard on for half the female students at your school, but you still light his fire. Just stay away from him, he's a prick and I overheard one of the blonde cheerleaders say that he's a lousy lay." Spike cocked his head to the side as he thought of the last time he'd been at the Bronze. "There's a bunch of short, spotty boys who are lusting after you."

"The chess club?" Dawn was surprised, they always scuttled away from her, she'd never have thought it was because they liked her.

"S'pose so, they look the type. Couple of other boys that have their eye on you. Oh, and a cute redheaded girl who wears really tight t-shirts. I like her, good taste that one." He grinned as Dawn blushed, the colour just touching her cheeks this time rather than turning her into a traffic beacon.

"So I'm not an unlovable freak who'll never have a boyfriend." Dawn meant it as a joke, but there was a hint of wonder and bitterness in her voice.

"Far from it, pet. You're quite the catch. So when you get home, give your new toy a test run and get some practice in for those nerd boys."

"Spike! Eew," Dawn laughed as Spike teased her about nerd germs.

"Seriously, love, thank Anya when you see her, it was very nice of her." Spike nudged Dawn with his foot. "Hey, if it's not to your liking, ask Anya to show you her toy box. You should be able pick something out you like and she'll exchange your gift for you."

"She has a box full?" Dawn looked surprised, she could barely cope with the idea of one vibrator, let alone a box of sex toys.

Spike winked. "Just ask her. Quite the adventurous little minx, is our Anya. Way too good for the likes of Xander. Now, what's this English essay?"

Tossing a sheaf of pages at Spike, Dawn ground her teeth. "The Importance of Being Earnest."

"Hey, don't knock Oscar Wilde, right clever bugger he was. Although, in the end, perhaps a bit too clever for his own good. Dru always had a thing for him, called him a man lost in time." He thumbed through the book. "Just because he's poking fun at the social bollocks of the day, you shouldn't overlook the power that Gwendoline and Cecily wield. In a time when women were considered an accessory, these girls show the spark that will turn them into Lady Bracknell, women that use their husband's to rule through. Now get your gear together and I'll see you safely home."

Dawn smiled to herself as she put everything back in her backpack and followed Spike upstairs. Despite the unexpected mortification of Anya's gift — which she would be thanking Anya for — her talk with Spike had been quite educational. Certainly more useful that the garbage they'd dished out at school. She wondered if she could get Spike to tell which of the boys at school thought she was cute.

Spike stopped by the door and filled his pockets with golf balls, passing Dawn a handful, she looked up at him in confusion. "Need to work on your throwing arm, love. Thought we'd get some practice in on the way. Besides, I feel the urge to detour past Xander's, not like he needs all those windows." He winked, Dawn's laughter a joyous sound in the dark of the cemetery. Wrapping a protective arm about her shoulders, they walked into the night.

**The End**


End file.
